diumenge, 16 d’agost de 2015

Political and economical concepts explained

Addendum: 



Traditional capitalism explained!
TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM
· You have two cows.
· You shell one and buy a bull.
· You herd multiplies, and economy grows.
· You sell them and retire on the in
come.

Surrealism explained!
SURREALISM
· You have two giraffes.
· The government requires you to tale harmonica lessons.

Political and worldwide corporations systems explained
COMMUNISM
· You have 2 cows
· The State takes both and gives you some milk.

Political and worldwide corporations systems explained
SOCIALISM
· You have 2 cows.
· You give one to your neighbor.

Political and worldwide corporations systems explained
FASCISM
· You have 2 cows.
· The State takes both and shells you some milk.

Political and worldwide corporations systems explained
VENTURE CAPITALISM
· You have two cows.
· You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debit/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows.
· The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island Company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who dells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company.
· The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more.

Political and worldwide corporations systems explained
BUREAUCRATISM
· You have 2 cows.
· The State takes both, shoots one, milks the other and then throws the milk away.


An american corporation explained!
AN AMERICAN CORPORATION
· You have two cows.
· You shell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows.
· Later, you hire a consultant to analyse why the cow has died.

Political and worldwide corporations systems explained
AN ITALIAN CORPORATION
· You have two cows, but you do not know where they are.
· You decide to have lunch.

Political and worldwide corporations systems explained
A FRENCH CORPORATION
· You have two cows.
· You go on strike, organize a riot, and block the roads, because you want three cows.

Political and worldwide corporations systems explained
A SWISS CORPORATION
· You have 5,000 cows.
· None of then belong to you.
· You charge the owners for storing them.

Political and worldwide corporations systems explained
A GREEK CORPORATION
· You have two cows borrowed from French and Germn banks.
· You eat both of them.
· The bankc call to collect their milk, but you cannot deliver, so you call the IMF.
· The IMF loans you two cows.
· You eat both of them.
· The banks and the IMF call to collect their cows/milk.
· You are out getting a hair cut.

Political and worldwide corporations systems explained
A BRITISH CORPORATION
· You have two cows.
· Both are mad.

Political and worldwide corporations systems explained
AN IRISH CORPORATION
· You have two cows.
· One of them is a horse.

Political and worldwide corporations systems explained
AN AUSTRALIAN CORPORATION
· You have two cows.
· Business seems pretty good.
· You close the ofice and go for a few beers to celebrate.

Political and worldwide corporations systems explained
A CHINESE CORPORATION
· You have two cows.
· You have 300 people milking them.
· You claim that you have full employment and high bovine productivity.
· You arrest the newsman who reported the real situation.

Political and worldwide corporations systems explained
AN INDIAN CORPORATION
· You have two cows.
· You worship them.

Political and worldwide corporations systems explained
AN IRAQI CORPORATION
· Everyone thinks you have lots of cows.
· You tell that you have none.
· Nobody believes you, so they bomb the crap out of you and invade your country.
· You still have no cows but at least you are now a Democracy.


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